Sunday, January 20, 2019

Rare, or Medium Rare?

It’s rare that you see men making the “choice” to scale back their ambitions and radically decrease their earnings so that they can be home with their kids;
 There's a saying that behind every big man there's an even bigger woman, usually his wife. From another angle, for a successful woman, do we ever place the importance of a man behind? Or we just assumed that they did it on their own? To make it more extreme, do we label the man behind a successful woman a loser because they didn't take their chance? Well, sometimes those men are also successful, even more successful than their spouse, just not as famous. When we make a commitment to start a family, and have kids, how do we position ourselves, share the responsibilities, and arrange our priorities? According to the quote above, you can become "rare" if you put your family before your job, but of course it can jeopardise your career (if you have one). It just took a misstep to get you "burned" to medium rare...

Wednesday, January 17, 2018

Taken for Granted

Are you working everyday to earn a good living, fulfill your passions and dreams, or just a routine to kill some times, maybe? If you work in an organization, of any size, do you just complete your tasks or do something more, like even help with your coworker's tasks? What do you feel about your workplace, your organization, do you feel recognized for your extra efforts and accordingly compensated or even accounted for? How do we recognized the good deeds we receive everyday or everytime, did a simple thank you or thank God is sufficient?. And why do I even bother asking these rambling questions?. It won't even make me feel better about myself, busting my ass off for a thankless job for years, a passionate job after all. When our priorities changed drastically, we keep on questioning ourselves if it's still worth the price. Alone at night when everyone's home, staring at the screen and punching more keys to save the day and the day after, for tomorrow is already arrived. It's just an ordinary day after all.

Friday, November 10, 2017

Back to Ordinary World

This year has been tough for us. Endless overtime, continous broken promises, and temporary shortage of lifelines plus a stockpile of debt. After what happened two years ago, I always thought the worst is over, but who knows what was just waiting on the corner. You would think two weeks with nothing to do or one month salary due is bad, imagine twice as bad, and you have a family. Looking back now, it's quite amazing, extremely lucky to be able to get out of the situation in one piece. Of course, we still clean up the wreckage. Hopefully, the worst is really over this time. One can only hope and pray for the best, and always learn to survive.

Monday, July 17, 2017

(We Are) Spirits in the Material World

Eid has passed, another procession of homecoming (sort of), family gathering, and the travel within. An annual pilgrimage that started with a thrilling hunt for transportation apparatus, back and forth. The logistical supply management came along eventually. When the deadline approach, the tension got higher, and the stakes got bigger. Finally, we make it through, complete with hectic journey and temporarily missing child. When the big day came, another journey in the heat to attend two family gatheering simultaneously. Just another routine, but surprisingly this year, these moments are a little bit interesting, even my wife thought so. When the themes for both occasions are completely opposite, talking about entrepeneurship and civil service as a life choice. Entrepeneurship, as in the jargon "Become your own employer" and "It's better to be a big fish in a small pond". Contrarily, the civil service is about the peace of mind and respectability of others. To complete the polarization, we have the third family gathering to balance them, to place spirituality vis-a-vis materiality. You cannot be more lucky (or confused) than that.

Thursday, June 22, 2017


My former boss died the other day, of stroke. He's just five months younger than me. When it's true that someone's death make us think about ours to come, nothing beats the death of someone close to us. Ironically, I've been ut of touch with him for about ten years, apart from social media interaction, which also rarely. I know that he seems didn't care much about his health. IT people typical, he works without limits, eat what he likes, and no (or minimum) workout. Knowing his death cause is the same as my father is still shocking though. And I still don't take the "explanation" that some curse causes it, no matter what the online noises said these days. He was a hardworking, no-nonsense type of guy. If we get the jargon "No Action, Talk Only" or "NATO" , for him it's "Big Talk, Hard Work". He always talk what he wants, spontaneously, straight to the point no second thought. Unfortunately, the social media heat lately has become poisonous and deceiving. As though we are forced to take sides, two extreme ones. Sadly, a couple years ago, a fellow programmer had an accident, got paralyzed, and eventually died. There were some coverage on the news, a couple of online website wrote his story sympathetically. Today, when he died, only a single coverage from online news website. The rest is followups to the curse and bullying, even sounds like a celebration of his death. This is a guy that works for his country, educating youth to create new IT developers, from any background. No mean of disrespect, but the late programmer I mention above was nothing compare to him, even when they both are good friends. And people will only remember his "blasphemy" and "curse" that lead to his sickness and eventual death.

Friday, May 27, 2016

Insipid (Dreams)

I watched a new "cartoon" with my daughter recently, only to realize that the film is too mature for her. Well, everything is too mature for a two years old girl, I think, The movie itself is quite funny, full of self-referenced joke (pun), such as this one: "Life isn't some cartoon musical where you sing a little song and your insipid dreams magically come true. So, let it go!". Everyone that's not sleeping away for the past three years must surely know where the reference come from. After the laughter and thrill is gone, somehow the words linger on. For your information, insipid means tasteless, lack of character or definition, or too sweet or sentimental. I guess it makes a great blog title, this blog especially. On the other hand, that quote give a good message: everything in life is not a given, you have to fight for it. Any two year old girl is mature enough for a message like that.

Friday, May 20, 2016

Life Begins at 40, The Game Ends at 41

(The card game, obviously). You know that when all the cards are revealed, it's all over. We live each day, suffling all our cards, take it in turn, hope to find the right one to keep. We already chose to collect a specific kind of card before. We wait and wonder if the next card will be the one to keep or even can finish the game. And then what? We all know the end of the road, the path to eternity that awaits. I dreamt about my mother last night, as if she never gone away. Funny how I never consider that to be such a big deal anyway. After four years, it seems that the gaps she left will never be filled. Finally, what if everyone collects the same set of cards? Did we really play the same game, the same rules, and the same deck?

Monday, June 08, 2015

Where Life Begins and Dreams End

It is said that life began at forty, and that's what keeps me wondering. Is it because we simply old enough to enjoy life, or we just become too old to chase our dreams, surrender to accept reality, in other words, the end of idealism and the start of pragmatism? When we wake up every morning and see our family begin the day, all the routines. We talk to our spouse about the future, and finally realize that no matter how hard we tried, it will never be good enough. When our children show their energy and compassion to learn and chase their dreams, would it be the sign to make our sacrifice? Of course, it doesn't always begin at forty. Maybe, forty seconds from now, who knows?.

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

25 or 6 to 40

Along the way, I saw many faces come and go, sometimes it's for good. You'd always get used to it eventually. And now is the time for some countdown...(Europe song in the background). Coincidentally or not, I found some inspirations to start writing articles for my blogs this week. Some treat for my reader (not readers, I know) and my sanity. This blog is almost 13 years old, bad luck eh? I just need to look at my very first post in this blog to see how far I come in English skill writing, not much I'm afraid.

Thursday, March 05, 2015

Another One Goes Up in the Air

Well, it happened again. I recently lost my cellphone again. I think it's the fifth or sixth times already. This time I lost two phone numbers since the cellphone can accept two SIM/RUIM cards. If the previous losses made me a bit panic, since it's the only cellphone I had, now I already have backups. The lost number can be retrieved easily, this time no charge billed. The other number that I usually used for data/internet connection is history, since I cannot afford to maintain multiple phone numbers now.Time to make count: in 12 years since I first use a cellphone, I already used 11 phones, six of them are lost, three of them got traded, and two are still in use. In simple statistics, I roughly change cellphone every year!