Switching to Blogger Beta and Three Endless Days

Today I'm switching this blog to the new version of Blogger (Blogger Beta) so it is now integrated with my Google (GMail) account. Well, it's about time to do so. It concludes my last three days, the endless days of work. At Monday, I'm getting enormous pain in my stomach as I wake up. Thought I got it from double doze of chili sauce the other day. No time to break, I must go to the office early or I miss my ride. Well, the road to office is varied from the freeway to the off road, so my pain was unbearable in the middle of the journey and I threw up in my sister's car. Concerning about it, my sister suggested that I should go home and take some rest. I refused, but not sure if that's the right thing to do. Well, it turned out to be the right decision. One of my co-worker was ill and absent, the other must take his exam and absent for half a day, and my boss was out for the whole day. So, I must take care of the business, substituted trainer for morning class, came to meeting at noon, and back again to office to install 3 servers to ship the next day (finish at 09.30pm). The next two days were not as hard as Monday but still, work in such a pressure with this condition, sick and lack of sleep is such a challenge, if not suicidal.

What Does Not Kill You...

A friend of mine once told me, what does not kill you only makes you stronger. I wonder if it goes backwards, what does not make you stronger gonna kill you... Picture this, you work as hard as you can, over your head, consuming all of your body can handle. No matter how hard you try, it's still not enough, in fact, it will never be enough.

All Wasted

My head is aching, my stomach is exploding, seems that I'm all wasted. Four days in a row outside the office really push my body over the limit. If that's not enough, tomorrow I will give another training (overtime), yeah... life is hard, life is real. Not to mention the ups and downs of doing training away from office and home (and I mean, far away). The grueling trainee, most of them did it quietly and deadly. Well, customer is king, and we play that role once in a while. After all, I thought I wrote this post in my sleep. Yeah right...

Wish

Do you ever wish you could disappear? That you could fly to anywhere, to live your dream instead of reality, the same routine you must perform every single day of your life?
Do you ever wish you were always on your own? That you didn't ever have to listen to anybody, that you could live your life for today, never thought about the future?
I wish I did, and always will.

The Missing Cellular (part 3)

Thursday, August 17 - Monday, August 21, 2006 : Long weekend in Semarang Tuesday, August 22 : back to office, still using the phone to receive call from CC sales Wednesday, August 23 : leave for office in my brother in law's car, got off in front of checkpost of GKBI Building (Sudirman), walk for about 10 meters out of the gate, I put my hand on my pocket, where I used to put my cellular phone. It's not there. As far as I remember, I didn't lose it, I thought I'd leave it home. That night, I found out it wasn't there. So, my cellphone is lost, but where and when, I'm not sure. The time between receiving the call the other day and realizing the loss was just routine to me. As I went home, I took th ephone out of my pocket and put it in the table next to my bed, and in the morning I put it backin my pocket. Now, the routine seems so complicated.

The First Drop (Welcome)

Why another blog? maybe because it's free and there's too many things I cannot say, but carelessly exposed it to the outer world. It's in English, not too good so people from my country won't reveal it too easily, and people internationally will consider it another clumsy attempt. One drop of water, inspired by a quote from the prophet:

...dip your finger into the ocean and lift it, the water that drops from your fingertip is the human knowledge and the rest of the ocean is God's knowledge...

In another popular reference, a religious song compare one drop of water from the ocean and the rest of the ocean with the world and the afterlife. And living my life one day at a time, that's just the way it always goes. Try not to bound to the past, and not look too far to the future, cause you'll never know what's gonna happen tommorow, or if there's tommorow after all.
So, this is my first drop of water, maybe not enough to quench the thirst or clean the dirt, but who knows it can break a stone.

Water Crisis and Fasting

In the past two weeks, our office has turn into water crisis. The kind of crisis you don't expect to happen, especially here at the heart of Jakarta. It reminds of me of the days when I was a little boy, the same crisis happened and nothing we can do about it. We had to save water exclusively for cooking and drinking (there hasn't been bottled drinking water yet), we barely took a bath, but keep for wudu (I can't find the proper word) instead. Yesterday was the first day of Ramadan, or fasting month, and the crisis is getting worse. You see, when fasting, we are not allowed to drink along the time, so wudu is the only way to get excitement of water. Some says that we may cheat during wudu, instead of chewing water, we drink some. But, when there's no water or scarce enough to warn us not to take that much excitement, or even go somewhere else to pray. Luckily, there's a mosque about five minutes form the office. But still, five minutes under the sun at this peak of dry season (ten if you count both ways) are not the best moment in fasting. To complete the package, I become the minority here and fasting alone (at least in my department) is hard enough without any compensation such as work hour reduction, and even get some food to break is a notorious problem here. But hey, life was, is , and will never be easy, just keep on surviving and cherish every day you pass. UPDATE (27-09-06): The water crisis is finally solved. It turns out to be the damaged waterpump.

Once in a Lifetime

What if you can live your dream, go to every new place, meet new people, I mean very high place and very important person, be a part of a revolution, and still unknown? Just like a time traveller that go back in time and be a part of American or French Revolution. The different is, the time is right now and the place is right here. I always value experience and pleasure (or enjoyment) higher than any price of money in the world. That's why I once told my friend that I'm willing to work unpaid as long as I can access internet for free, anytime I want, any way I want it to. Because accessing internet means new experience, new journey everytime. I can't travel farther than Java island all my life, the only place I think I'll be able to go farthest is Mecca (for pilgrimage journey). Becoming a witness for historical moments is priceless, it's a chance for a lifetime.

Enjoy the Pressure

Sometimes I wonder, if we live without stress will life still worth living for? When we works in an established institution, with a clear career path, satisfactory wages, loaded with extras, plus we have our home sweet home with a family to go home to. The job we do everyday is the same old routine from day one, just with higher job title and paycheck. What a life it would be... Now picture this situation: you work in a newly developed company, doing every dirty jobs available, constantly changed environment (especially the boss' mood), and uncertain future of the company, also your employment status (and the continuity of your paycheck). Now, can you feel the pressure?

Daydream

Do you ever wish you were someone else, when you sit down in front of your PC, not knowing what to do? Do you always feel so very tired when you (finally) come home after a long journey from the office? Then you go to sleep wishing there will be no dream of tommorow, the same routine all over again? And in the middle of work you get messages from your old friends, schoolmate, roomate, just letting you know where they are, on a better place of course. Your friends have go abroad, get a better job (and paycheck), make a newspaper headline, move to a new house, etc, etc. Now, look at yourself... are those things ever happen to you? Not a little bit, you're now still fighting for a quest of a lifetime. You're stuck in this place realizing there's not much left out there. You wonder...